Friday, September 9, 2011

Winter White Begins: The Little White Dress

Sophia Loren: one of Larry David's "sources" (ahem) and a source of inspiration to this blog
In LA we're facing a familiar conundrum: as the rest of the civilized world prepares for autumn with luxurious, practically orgasmic shopping sprees full of knits and suits and coats and boots, temperatures are blaring up to the 100's and the last thing we can do is even look at winter's goodies without feeling faint.  Driven by extreme heat and the neuroses of millions, tempers are flaring across our fair city.  Last night I almost witnessed a fist fight between my gentle acting coach and a raging imbecile at a gas station in the valley.  The moral of this story: be careful out there, the heat-baked natives of LA are getting restive.  At very this moment I am cocooned in a chrysalis of bliss, blinds and curtains and two air conditioners, feeling very much the summer hermit.

There is an answer to all this: white.  White is crisp.  Cooling.  Elegant.  It's like that magical, silvery tinkling sound that ice makes when you're pouring a drink.  And although the runways this fall were ablaze in the most lavish peacock jewel-tones, there was also a significant amount of white.  This season, Givenchy's entire couture collection was white:

Givenchy Couture Fall 2011
Just look at these gorgeous dresses, long, lean elegant, with the most seductive whispery textures.  They're so light and delicate, dream-like, rhapsodic, a winter ballet. 
Let's examine what should be, in my opinion, the look du jour, the Little White Dress:

Moschino Fall 2011
Winter white should be smart and structured -- not the loose white cottons and billowing caftans of summer, not the pastry-project-gone-wrong foof of bridal gowns, not the skin-tight garish white dresses worn by tipsy girls stumbling around in heels in Hollywood clubs looking like bewildered giraffes on skates.  No, no, no.  Winter White should be sophisticated, tailored, elegant, smart, in touch-me textures. 

Vintage Balenciaga a mere $4600 at
Here is the little white dress in structured satin: pearl-lustrous, chic, demure, witty.

Alexander Mcqueen Fall 2011
Look like a delicate lunar-white-moth in this short frothy white dress, keeping them guessing with a restrained-kinky Elizabethan neckline caressing your throat.  Sometimes it's much more powerful and sexy to keep things covered up.  Yes, Assorted-Starlets-Exiting-Cars, that includes your vagina, honey.  I'm sorry no one has told you that before.

Raquel Welch: the elegant feline pet-me quality of white texture in The Little White Dress

A modern version: Minkpink Great Escape Dress $99

The Little White Dress is the most perfect thing for LA this time of year.  We can wear The Little White Dress in these final ragged days of summer, wear it hiding out daytime in the air-conditioning like little burrowing moles, or going out to lunches sweating on pretentious patios, and we can wear it out, butterfly-like, in the nights with air as warm as a bath and the smell of jasmine vines heavy in the stagnant city air.

As the weather turns chilly, add a faux fur coat or sleek white trench to the summer Little White Dress and voila! it magically becomes jet-set chic, the beginning of sexy winter white.

1 comment:

Lori said...

oh,oh oh, the Moschina Fall 2011 winter white dress--I want it! Plus, this was so funny. Assorted Starlets exiting cars, and giraffes on skates--watch out: YUU have been warned! It's unfortunately so, so true.